Apollo Report / Finest Fake Apple News

One More Thing: Next iPhone model to feature even longer display as Apple CEO experiments with Viagra

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Last September Apple launched its sixth generation iPhone curiously dubbed the iPhone 5. While the casing certainly wasn't a radical redesign, the updated iPhone did feature a larger display for the first time since its debut in 2007. 

Historically, when Apple makes a change like this, it uses science and reason to explain its decision, but last year's screen growth was presented with almost no explanation aside from its 16:9 support.

Earlier today Gizmodo uncovered the sexual logic behind large smartphone displays, and while Apollo Report announced its hiatus last week, we just had to investigate further. What we found was shocking: a direct correlation indeed exists between smartphone size and male reproductive organs.

The long rumored iPhone 5S is set to be released as soon as this June, sources reveal. Apple's iPhone 5S will reportedly features a 4.7" display but contains no increased width. The smartphone will be even longer than the iPhone 5, reflecting Tim Cook's recent success with Viagra, and last even longer than before... the battery life that is.

Okay, back on hiatus in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Josh Topolsky's actual guess at how the next iPhone will appear.

Josh Topolsky's actual guess at how the next iPhone will appear.

Jim Dalrymple admits he works for Apple

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Jim Dalrymple says he's been on Apple's payroll since starting The Loop:

I really should mention Maps, Apple’s new turn-by-turn direction app on the iPhone. I love it. I used in Cupertino and I used it at home — it worked equally well in both places. Using Siri and Maps together, I can get information and directions to pretty much anywhere I want to go. The street labels in Maps are easy to read while driving, which is great at a quick glance and the spoken directions were great for me.

Happy April Fools' Day, everybody.

Google shutting down YouTube

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Shortly after shutting down Reader, Google announced today that they will pull the plug on YouTube. Google bought YouTube in 2006 for $1.65 billion with the internal goal of picking the best video.

You can read Google's statement and watch the video below.

Thanks for all your great entries. 
YouTube finally has enough videos to begin selecting a winner. 
What do you think is the #bestvideo on YouTube?
We've been thrilled with all of the diverse, creative entries we've seen so far, and we can't wait to begin the process of selecting the best video. We'll be announcing the winner in 10 years.

Would Podcasts.app still have reel-to-reel?

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To our customers,
At Apple, we strive to make world-class products that deliver the best experience possible to our customers. With the launch of our new Maps last week, we fell short on this commitment. We are extremely sorry for the frustration this has caused our customers and we are doing everything we can to make Maps better.
We launched Maps initially with the first version of iOS. As time progressed, we wanted to provide our customers with even better Maps including features such as turn-by-turn directions, voice integration, Flyover and vector-based maps. In order to do this, we had to create a new version of Maps from the ground up.
There are already more than 100 million iOS devices using the new Apple Maps, with more and more joining us every day. In just over a week, iOS users with the new Maps have already searched for nearly half a billion locations. The more our customers use our Maps the better it will get and we greatly appreciate all of the feedback we have received from you.
While we’re improving Maps, you can try alternatives by downloading map apps from the App Store like Bing, MapQuest and Waze, or use Google or Nokia maps by going to their websites and creating an icon on your home screen to their web app.
Everything we do at Apple is aimed at making our products the best in the world. We know that you expect that from us, and we will keep working non-stop until Maps lives up to the same incredibly high standard.
Scott Forstall
Senior Vice President, iOS Software

Twitter smartphone with Apple launching soon, TwitPhone one possible name

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Twitter is partnering with Apple to compete with Facebook and HTC's rumored smartphone, according to people familiar with the matter.

The Twitter smartphone will reportedly run on a modified version of the popular iPhone software, while Facebook chose Google's immaculate software for their offering. Twitter will replace iMessage with the much more reliable Twitter Direct Messaging, which limits messages to 140 characters.

Twitter has had some level of integration with iOS for a while now, but the rumored TwitPhone will further bake in 'discovery' and 'connect' into the OS, which huge Twitter aficionados will appreciate.

The TwitPhone will have the same hardware as the Apple iPhone 5 with one noticeable change: the home button will be replaced with a dedicated Tweet button featuring Twitter's most recent logo.

Apollo Report expects the TwitPhone to debut publicly on April 2, although no press will be allowed.

Apple denies T-Mobile iPhone

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Terrence O'Brien covering the T-Mobile iPhone event for Engadget:

The biggest change to the iPhone 5 for T-Mo is the addition of HD Voice capabilities. We were able to give the feature a quick try and the results were pretty clear and lacked the tinniness often associated with cellphone calls. That being said, in the noisy event hall it was a little tough to get a full taste of the experience and there was a slight echo on the receiving end. Of course, you'll need two devices with HD Voice to take advantage and that's still a pretty small selection of handsets on the market at the moment.

I have no idea what this guy is talking about. According to my sources at Apple, the company has no such plans to partner with T-Mobile.

T-Mobile tries to boost reputation by pretending to support iPhone

T-Mobile tries to boost reputation by pretending to support iPhone

Apple ticks closer to iWatch launch, remotely bricks Pebble watches

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Apple is continuing its aggressive campaign against its competition.

In the latest offensive move out of Cupertino, the company has remotely disabled a handful of Pebble smartwatches in an effort to create more space for itself in the watch market.

Philip W. Schiller, SVP of Worldwide Marketing, denied the company’s role in the attack. 

“Much like Android, Pebble can do bad on its own. All we have to do is watch,” the outspoken executive said.

Nevertheless, an Apple engineer who asked to remain anonymous for obvious reasons insisted the company was responsible for the bricking.

Gray Powell returns to Apple in security role

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Apple CEO Tim Cook and former Apple engineer Gray Powell were spotted sharing drinks at Gourmet Haus Staudt in Redwood City, California, earlier this evening.

Mr. Powell, who is most notably known for his role in successfully launching the iPhone 4 in 2010, has been quietly serving as SVP of Software Security since Apple updated iOS to 6.1 earlier this year, according to people familiar with the situation.

Sources reveal Mr. Cook’s hiring committee unanimously chose Mr. Powell to fill the newly created role.

UPDATE: Gray Powell is reportedly working closely with the Find My iPhone team to develop the next major update to the iPhone tracking app.

"Inside ‘Apple Anonymous’: The Secret Society of Apple’s Retail Army"→

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Phenomenal profile on Apple Retail and social media by Mark Gurman at 9to5Mac:

Even with strict, Apple Corporate-implemented policies on social media usage of its employees, a portion of Apple retail employees have formed an under-the-radar, “Apple Anonymous” community over social media sites like Twitter and Google+. The majority of these employees work on these social media networks under “anonymous” personalities. This is in order to keep Apple from discovering the true identities of the rebel employees. Discussing the work place (especially with negativity) and discussing internal policies online is strictly forbidden by Apple and a cause for termination. No questions asked.

Did I mention I might have contributed to the reporting?

Nilay Patel confirms iWatch, Apple puts product back on the shelf

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Nilay Patel confirmed earlier this month that the rumored iWatch is currently being developed by Apple and will be released later this year. Apple responded to Mr. Patel’s report, announcing it originally had plans to demo the iWatch at WWDC in June but would put the product back on the shelf.

This isn’t anything new for the managing editor of The Verge. Just last September, Mr. Patel exclusively reported that Amazon was set to possibly announce an Amazon Phone the following day.

Multiple sources have confirmed to The Verge that Amazon is working on a smartphone that runs a variant of the Kindle Fire's Android-based operating system, and we're now hearing that the device will be shown to the press tomorrow.

Amazon was on the cuff of releasing their smartphone but mysteriously shelved it following Mr. Patel’s reporting.

Mr. Patel’s historic struggle to break news doesn’t end with tech companies taunting him. Just today he caught Mac blogger John Gruber’s attention with this piece to which he contributed.

A spokesman for The Verge did not immediately respond to an email seeking comment Tuesday.

How to AirPlay audio to Apple TV without using the display

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I use my Apple TV for a lot of things. I keep a subscription to Netflix and Hulu Plus on autopilot, even though I probably don’t watch enough movies or TV shows to justify the expense. For me, the magic in Apple TV is all about AirPlay. I constantly listen to podcasts in Instacast from my iPhone or iPad mini, but I’m not a huge fan of listening to talk in my headphones and the speakers on these devices certainly have a long way to go.

The sound system in my car creates an excellent podcast listening experience during my commute, but when I’m home it’s Apple TV that matches the quality of that experience. It’s worth noting that I’ve tried the Jambox by Jawbone as well as a traditional stereo networked with an Apple Airport Express, but the former was too cumbersome to connect to thanks to the challenges Bluetooth presents, and the latter solution with AirPlay was convenient but either too bass heavy or just not loud enough for listening. The speakers on my HDTV are tuned for the vocal ranges you hear in a podcast and can even handle music streaming quite well.

I know what you’re thinking. “You use you’re television to listen to music?” I can see the problem that would present. For one, running a display is both a waste of energy and surely costly toward the life of your television. What’s worse is having a display unforgivingly illuminating a dark room when all you want to do is fall asleep to some talk radio or a nice Songza bedtime playlist. Sure, you can tweak the display brightness to next to nothing, but if your like me and you like your sleeping quarters cool and dark, a lit display can never be dark enough, especially when you account for your eyes compensating for the darkness.

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